|Camping. Because YOU care.
||[Jul. 17th, 2004|03:43 am]
|||||L'Ame Immortelle - Slut||]|
The camping trip actually went really, really well. I'm happy with how everything went, and I'd like to remember it as well as I can. So, writing!!
I woke up. This is an IMPORTANT detail. I took my driving test the day before, and I passed! It was so cool. I was really happy about it. But I didn't call Tammi and Marty the night before to let them know that they don't have to come pick me up this fine morning. So I groggily stomp my way up the stairs and call Tammi. She is really happy and congradulates me. I thank her - she tells me that Marty's car is really full already and she has a lot of errands to run and has to go get Matt. I offer to go get him - I can't do her errands for her! So she gives me his number - I'm supposed to call him when I get there. So I shower, [which will be the last time for a few days] put on the Mighty Trucker Hat and get my ass in the car and go to Wal-Mart. I buy ibuprofin there and a disposable camera. Better to ruin a crappy plastic camera than one I actually could have spent real money on, right? So I toss these things in the back seat and rock out to my silly little CD player. It was rockin'. So I get onto the interstate, which I hate driving on. And I get on the right exit and manage to get to Matt's place. I'm sitting outside the apartment building, realizing I don't know what apartment he lives in. Shit. So I try calling him, but my cell phone informs me this number doesn't exist. I double-check it with the number Tammi gave me and it matches... [I later found out I had to dial the area code or the cell thinks that the number doesn't exist.] I call Tammi and harass the poor woman some more. She gives me Matt's apartment number and I go ring the bell. He's surprised to hear from me. Well, I think he was expecting Tammi for one, and about a half an hour later for another. But he lets me in and opens the door. O_o. He stumbles off, chiding me for not calling. I explain that my cell is retarded and he laughs. He's had no sleep - about three hours. He puts his shirt on backwards. I don't say anything - he noticed anyway. So we throw shit in the backseat. He's cheerful and talkative, as always. Which is nice for me, because I'm nervous as hell. He teases me most of the way back to Tammi and Marty's. Tammi lets us in, and we talk about strange things for about an hour, waiting for Marty to get back from work. We discuss the joys of children's shows, people having sex and Matt's tendency to be riddled with unpleasant images he shares with us all. Marty gets back when we're having some sort of awkward moment... But we move everything into the cars. It's funny. I have Mighty Trucker Hat. If I'm going to be SuperGreaseBall, I might as well put SuperGreaseBallHair under something. Matt directs my crappy driving to the Hornbacher's. We go in and buy a lot of meat. A LOT of meat. No one made one homoerotic comment on it, though, so I just thought it to myself and giggled. Like a 'tard. We buy ice and meat, cookies and some other stuff... mostly meat. Matt scurries away and Tammi buys crayons. Marty is off being mysterious. I have no idea where he went at this point in time. I end up scurrying off to the bathroom shortly afterward. I hate driving on the interstate, and I might as well not have to pee while doing so. We buy our food, which is very thrilling. Meat is not cheap, for those who do not often buy four days' worth of meat. We head out to the cars, trying to shove coolers into my backseat. They somehow manage to fit! This is still a mystery to me. We have food now. Tammi and I scurry back into there to buy more ice. We discuss the joys of moving dirty boxes and icey... ice bags... and her co-worker's problem with Dirty Boobies. It happened to be on that topic, because of the tendency to get things on her chest. But we get everything packed in and we head out. I try to follow Marty, with Matt's direction. We are on the road and Matt and I discuss games and the finer points of being as geeky as we all are. We get into the place, we buy the permit for my car and we are off again. It's a good drive out to the campsite and we get there and set up tents and throw the firewood against the cement block in the ground. We cover that with a tarp. Yay for foresight, huh? I help Matt set up his tent, again with a lot of direction. Because I never know what the hell is going on. He puts his stuff in it, I stand like a 'tard. This will be an interesting trip. If I manage to start paying attention, anyway... Tammi and Marty get their tent set up as well. You may have guessed this point. So everything is all out and in place and it's hot as hell and humid, to boot. So we head down to the lake, in my Sexy Beast Car. My skills in driving make other people laugh. They are slow and somewhat crappy. But we get there, alive, and Tammi and Matt wade into the lake. Marty and I sit like super-cool people on the beach, cracking retarded jokes and thinking we are somewhat witty. Well, he was. I wasn't. After a while, we get hungry and decide we ought to head back and eat food. So we drive back. It's a happy time with my no-direction and Matt consistently shotgun. Why is it called shotgun? Anyway. Matt tells me when we get back that I best put some shit in a tent. I don't know which one I'm staying in, so I ask which one I'm supposed to put shit in. He thinks, tells me that Tammi and Marty's will be somewhat cramped, and if I want, I am welcome to stay with him. I take him up on that offer. He says that I don't have to worry, he will not molest me in the night. I laugh and tell him that the thought didn't cross my mind. He looks disappointed and wails, "Ah! I'm not even a threat anymore!!" Someone informs him that this is because he is married, thus, he is sexless. I toss my stuff in with his. I am super-careful with my stuff, as always. I am mostly unaware of my surroundings. We sit in the tent and I am taught how to play cribbage. How the hell is "cribbage" spelled, anyway? Matt sleeps, Tammi reads. Marty teaches me how to play. He wins, of course. He has this mystery called... "skill." Which I do not possess. There was this great moment when I learned what, "Nineteen" in cribbage means. It does NOT mean, as I thought, that it cancels out points. O_o. It means you didn't have any. Why nineteen is used, I do not know. ^^;; Then we are hungry, so we cook dinner, which I don't remember what it was. Likely, it was meat. What a shock! They wonder why I do not sit on a chair. I am happy with the ground - furniture is for Satan-worshippers. Tammi starts to roast marshmallows. She tells me to take over for her, for she is eating a gooey chocolate-marshmallow thingy, which I can't remember the name of! After about a minute, the thing is melting off the skewer - Marty tells me to swing it over by him and I do, accidentally burning him. He insists I didn't, so I let it go, managing to catch Matt's hand with the hot metal. He yelps and I apologize, then feel really shitty. We burn paper and bills, and a Neopet plastic box, which Matt is no longer allowed to burn. We do a toast with mead, when the park people aren't watching us. We're good people. On the inside. Really. I eventually have to do the first toast, and I can't think of a thing and sputter out, "Uh... to not dying?" Marty laughs and says, "Immortality? I'll drink to that!" And does so. It wasn't quite what I meant, but oh well - it was a toast. We all toast to something, I think. We finish off a half a bottle of mead, mostly by Marty and Tammi. We take a walk down to a sight-seeing place to look at stars, but I am distracted the whole way. I don't want to turn on my flashlight - we've got three on already. Might as well not use it if I don't have to. And I'm staring up at the sky, looking at the pretty little gas jewels, wandering off the path. I catch myself before making an ass of me and falling into a ditch or something. Suddenly, in the middle of the road, we stop. We are watching the stars, and I am happy. And cold. Tammi leans on Marty and Matt wanders about, looking at stuff and eventually comes over to me, asking me if I'm bored - I live out in the boonies, and probably do this all the time. I tell him no, I really like watching stars. To tell the truth, I don't do it as much as I would like. Light pollution sucks balls. He grins and elbows me, in his Matt-like way. Marty asks me a couple of times on the way there and back if I'm okay. I am, just... distracted. I want to look at this one tree, but we walk past it and a park ranger drives by and tells us to hurry on back to our campsite... so I let it go. I want to sit and stare at nothing for a little while, so Matt heads off before going to sleep, Tammi [so I assumed] wanted some time with Marty, and I lay on my back near the water. I am only half-awake, when Matt comes back and stumbles into the tent. Tammi goes to bed and Marty asks me again if I am okay, and I respond that I am. He goes to bed, too, and I realize about ten minutes later that I will wake Matt up by getting into the tent. So I go up to the latrine and stuff and come back, hesitating at entering the tent. Finally, I did, trying to be quiet and failing miserably. I failed my check, apparently. As I fall ungracefully into the tent, smashing my head into the ground, I realize he wasn't asleep anyway. So must for subtlety, huh? And that was fine, but I was all awkward. If I'm going to be sleeping in here with him, I best not sing, talk, or snore loudly. That is unpleasant. There are just things about me the world does NOT need to hear. O_o. We have enough space in which I can flail, but I best not do that, either. I gave a girl a bloody nose once from that... I lay on my belly, finally willing myself to go to sleep in the hot, stuffy sleeping bag. Damn thing. Ever notices that when you sleep outside, the temperature fluctuates constantly? Maybe it's just me. I wake up in the middle of the night and I don't know why. Matt says, "Well, that question is answered. Did you hear that tree fall?" I tell him no, I didn't, all groggy. I sleep like I'm dead. I am not what one would call a... morning person. I am what one would call a "heavy sleeper." You try to wake me up and I try to punch you in the teeth. Or grunt loudly at you. But there were no bruises, so I shall assume I did not connect on the swing... XD
I wake up about a half an hour before Matt. But I don't want to exit and give him a faceful of ass or wake him up. And I'll likely do both, with my excessive grace. So I lay awake, pondering shit, when he wakes up and I sit up, staring like a 'tard off into space. Tammi is very excited, because a turtle came up to the shore [about where I was sitting the night before] to lay her eggs. She had apparently been there for about three hours and Tammi took a lot of pictures of it. We sit by the fire, eat sausages, have a scare because Matt thinks I forgot his stove... I just didn't know it was box-shaped! It was. It is the mystery box-stove. So he and Marty cook up sausage and hashbrowns, and we all eat them. Like one normally does with breafast... O_o. It was kindof early, and we sit on our asses and be cool until it gets too humid, when we played cribbage in the tent for awhile and Tammi read. She isn't fond of card games. But she's happy with her Stephen King book, Needful Things. We drive down to the lake again, and this time I remember to bring my book and my pencils. Now I know I'm a geek. Pencils at the beach. Ho-yeah! Matt and Tammi wander off, wanting to go in the water, but it's really windy. It sort of clears up and Matt and Tammi go wading for rocks again. Matt comes up to me and asks tries, in vain, to convince me to go in the water. I decline. Because going in water is for SATANISTS! It's a very convieniet, catch-all excuse. It rains on and off all day, but the afternoon is very clear and humid. The lake is still windy. Matt ends up getting kinda sick and we decide to head back. But we can see that it's going to storm and it's going to be a boomer. At one point or another, Matt informs me that, "Well, now you can tell your mom that you slept with me!" I consider this for a moment... then decide that my mother would probably not appreciate that humor. She wouldn't get it. And then I'd probably be grounded for three months. But the look on her face would be worth it... >_o We get back to the campsite and eat hot dogs, which Tammi and I cook. The ones I cook get all scorchy. And burned. Matt is trying to shift something in the fire and fire leaps up and scorches his hand, which makes him yelp. Poor guy. We all tease each other like retards and break out the mead. Marty toasts to something that I can't remember, Tammi toasts to kittens, Matt toasts silently, and I can't think of anything and toast to... a good storm. Matt find this weird, but pours a little into the fire anyway. Well, I guess I have the SUPERPOWER [because it stormed like all hell that night].... We hang out in the tent for awhile, and I keep getting this uneasy feeling. I've had it before, with some other things and the night before. We kindof stumble into that type of topic and I blurt out, "Does anyone else feel that?!" No one answers. Marty seems to be sleeping and Matt asks me what I'm talking about. I try to explain, but it doesn't work very well. If I learned how to use my brain and tongue in UNISON, talking might work better. We decide we're going to head off into bed, then. After wandering around in the dark like super-cool people that we are, we get into the tent. I discover that Matt is impossible to be angry around. You learn something every day, I guess. Just as it's starting to rain and I'm out like a light. I didn't even feel tired. But about an hour later, Matt is poking me, asking me, "Hey, is your car unlocked?" I am not conscious, so I just respond, "...uh-huh.....why?" He tells me, "Well, we're gonna go sleep in it." I ask him why - this is making no sense to me. I sit up and a very loud clap of thunder goes off, making me jump. He explains that the tent is leaking and we go crash in the car. I had been sleeping in a puddle. Had he not informed me, I would have slept in the puddle the whole night and wondered why my ass was cold. Me as a lookout is not a good idea. My car is not the most comfortable. But we sleep, soaked. I giggle at some fart joke in my head. Wow, consciousness is fun!
We end up waking up at five-thirty AM. We've slept for about six hours. We're tired and kindof zooey. At least, I am. We try to start a fire, and it's not working. Everything is soaked. We eventually get one started, Tammi gets up and we all have lemon tea. It tastes really good, even though I burn the fuck out of my tongue. Marty gets up an hour later, so it's around seven-thirty. We eat breakfast, sausages and hashbrowns again. Everything is going okay, but we're out of charcoal and ice. So Marty says he'll drive in and get some, who wants to come with? Matt says he's staying, Tammi says she is, so I go. We have a nice talk on the way into Pelican Rapids. We drive into the grocery store parking lot, and it's closed Sundays, so we scoot over to the gas station and I wander off to find charcoal. We buy stuff. We get back and we don't see anybody. Apparently, our ever-conscious camp guards fell asleep. Which is fine. None of us have slept much. We take some pictures of Matt, which I think is fucking hilarious. Marty is quiet, as usual. We sit around and wait for Matt to wake up. Marty falls asleep in the chair next to the fire. Tammi roasts more marshmallows and we eat them. They are delicious. Matt wakes up and comes to harass. Tammi has braided Matt's hair and Marty's by this point and lets me braid hers. Mine has lost its hairband, so I just let it sit. We hang around some more and then head to the lake. I sit and try to draw stuff, and all three of them wander off to look for pretty rocks. It goes okay, but I am not pleased with my attempts. I get mad about trying to draw the trees like people, but they look like they're having a good butt-fuck. Sometimes I wonder why half the shit I draw looks like things having a good butt-fuck. It's a gift. Matt comes and sits by me again, and tries to convince me of going in the water. I continue my three-day not-going-in-the-water streak. Matt claps me on the back and dances off. Marty comes up after awhile and sits. He looks through my notebook, liking the Wendy and Juno drawing, which is embarrassing... I whine about the trees when he gets to them. He insists they are good. I insist they suck balls, as always. So Marty wants to prove that I am a better artist, so he starts drawing. I let him, enjoying waiting for it. I don't want him to feel rushed. Matt and Tammi come up, and Tammi dumps rocks onto the table, happy and wet. They invite me to go down with them and I say, "...okay." Matt is shocked and teases me and I just grin at him. We walk down to the park line and they go pretty far out. I hear this kid screeching, "Owwie! Owwie!! OW!" And he seems to be stuck, so I slosh over there and ask him if he's okay. He shrieks. Jeez, don't answer me or anything. I get closer and he slides out from where he's stuck. I ask him if it's all okay and he goes, "Uh... yeah!!" And runs desperately away from me. I shrug and slosh back over to Tammi and Matt, who both look at me inquisitively. I explain that the kid was stuck. I hate hearing crying. I don't like children, but I don't like hearing them cry. It is not only a very unsettling noise, but it's kindof grating. We walk back and Marty finally finishes and lets me see. I like it very, very much. So we sit and Tammi and Matt come back. We drive back to the campsite. Tammi and Marty cook some hot dogs and brats, which fall repeatedly into the fire. This pisses off Marty a lot, and we eventually get them cleaned off and cooked. They taste good. We break out the mead and toast again, to whatever comes to mind. I toast to stuff. We all go and crash in the tent. We're all in one tent now, because no one wants to go sleep in the marvelous bed-car, with me on the far right, then Matt next to me, Tammi next to him and Marty on the far left. Weird conversations ensue. I learn that sometimes, it is better to sleep a lot. I have a weird dream that I can't remember now. >_<
We all eventually wake up. Yay! We lived! I actually woke up a few times in the night on top of other people, but they weren't aware of it. Which is probably better for everyone. We put everything in the cars and go to Pelican for breakfast. I am told that the pancakes are of the Devil. Best not to eat them, I suppose. The food of the Devil will turn me into a raving Satanist! With low self-esteem!! Gr! >_< I bring Matt home and drag his stuff into his place. I go home and shower. It is a weird feeling to be clean. O_o. Weird good. Not weird bad.
Well, there is the mighty camping trip in all its glory. Of course, I edited out the wild orgies and the intense drug usage, but you know... Just gotta roll with it. *_*
Oh yeah, and now Matt knows how I describe him. Haha.